We, at FT Broadcast, realize that our country is still developing and that anyone who has the courage to stand out and take a step that many would hesitate taking, needs to be acknowledged. We understand the various challenges that women have to face in India. While the world is developing in various fields, women in our country, have to still be careful while just stepping out at night or wearing a dress which can perceived to be ‘improper’. One aspect of a woman’s life that is considered to be the most ‘scandalous’, is perhaps being a single mother or a divorcee;considered brave by some and pitied by others.
We got a chance to talk to such a mother of two, who is raising her children all by herself. She cooks meals in houses in surrounding societies and NO, she neither wants to be pitied nor does she want to get re- married.
Rupa has a heart breaking story. She got married when she was only 14- 15 years old. She lived with her husband just for 5 years and by that time both her children were already born. Her sister, who was 11 years of age at that time, came to live with them. Rupa was not very close to her. And one unfortunate day, Rupa’s husband and sister eloped together to get married. They have two children together until very recently, the sister died under mysterious circumstances. Rupa’s other sister blames her of somehow instigating the now deceased sister into taking her own life. The husband plans to get married again now.
How old are your kids? Do they go to school?
I have two kids, one girl who is 15 years old and a 12 year old boy. Yes they go to school. The girl is in 8th and and the boy is in 7th.
Being a single mother, how do you manage the entire household including your children?
It is very difficult (laughs) but I manage!
Do you feel safe living alone with them also considering that you have a daughter?
I feel very scared for my children. The world is very bad. I am always tensed even when I am away at work. That’s why I always want to finish my work fast and rush back home.
Do you think that your daughter seeing you manage so well has learnt that she can handle life on her own?
Yes she has grown up seeing me and learnt a lot. She is brave and responsible. I’ll make sure she doesn’t go through what I did.
Does your son respect you for all the great responsibilities that you singlehandedly manage to do?
Yes of course. He is very understanding and helping. He is home right now and would have finished a few chores that I told him to do. He helps me out. I will just have to make food for us.
Are your neighbors understanding towards you considering the fact that you are a single mother?
Everyone wants to take advantage in this world. My neighbors are understanding but I do not trust anybody. People cannot be trusted.
Do you want to get re- married? Do you think getting married again will in any way be beneficial for you?
No I do not wish to be remarried. It will only cause harm to my children. How can I trust a new man after all that has happened? Life is risky.
Any message that you want to convey to those multiple brave women who are success-fully leading lives with their kids, independently and happily?
I don’t think people should just get married. It is very difficult to find someone good. Women should earn themselves and take control. Marriage is definitely not the solution to everything. Many people tell me to get married but i will never go ahead with it. I am scared for my children (says with tears in eyes). I cannot risk even a bit or trust anyone. Women go through so much. I have gone through very tough times in my life. I still see other women tolerating hardships in their lives. But now, I am happy with my children (smiles).
There are countless women in our country who, like Rupa, are married off at such young ages because when a girl is born in a family, it is assumed that her ‘role’ is to do house work and then serve another man and his family when she is of a suitable age. On one side India has broken a world record by launching 104 satellites and on other side are such scenarios where girls are still not sent to schools. Education is not only studying and giving exams, it is also broadening your horizon, changing your thoughts and seeing the world from a new and better perspective. Rupa has experienced the worse in her life. And that is why she wants her daughter to continue and finish her education so that she becomes independent. She wants her son to grow up as a good man, respecting women. She feels sad and furious thinking about how her life turned out to be but she is happy with her loving children. They are proud of their mother today.
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